Fell off the face of the Earth

I had this friend in college, Jesse, who became a very close friend to me the first few years of school, resurface just yesterday. Being a renegade himself, living and traveling all over the world most of his life, it wasn't a complete surprise that he hadn't contacted myself or my brother in just less than a year. Low and behold he called just yesterday. Sounding quite disheveled on the phone made me question if it were actually him on the other end. Well a lot has happened since the last time we spoke, such as him getting married, losing his leg to a brown recluse spider, planing his own funeral, and being in the current process of choosing a prosthetic leg, which I assured him could turnout to be somewhat sweet. Of course I took the opportunity to brag about my newly superior basketball skills, maybe to lighten up the conversation? My first question when all of this information was being relayed to me was - what the hell, where was my wedding invitation? I happen to love weddings, the party afterward, and everyone being in such a great mood. Quite offended upon hearing this news. (The leg being on the backburner.) 

What troubled me the most about this phone call was that Jesse thought I would not still be friends with him if I knew he had one less appendage. Who gives a shit? Yeah I can't be seen with someone missing a leg, that might be embarrassing. Ha. A point was brought up to me later, that I had only thought about briefly during the conversation due to there being a distress element, pertaining to the missing time in between the spider bite (July) and when contact was made, yesterday. What happened to unanswered messages of the email variety? In the next conversation, since the last was difficult on Jesse's part evidently, I will address said questions. Personally, I couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose a leg, except getting the closest parking spaces of course. Coincidentally, Tristan and I were talking about his fall from the Earth not a week before the infamous phone call. Somehow he managed to climb back on for now.