Forces at Work

There are always a few forces working against what is being worked for. Being fortuitous, working harder, or a combination of the two will end up being the only things that lead to perseverance. I remember working toward a national swim cut during my junior year of high school and contracting walking pneumonia a week before the Zones Meet that depleted me of all my energy and even more crucial, my ability to breathe. Being a sprinter, lung capacity has to be at a maximum for replenishing muscles and reducing drag by not breathing. At the time I couldn't understand why this was happening. I had taken all the proper precautions, eaten well no junk food, and prepared myself accordingly through hard work in practice and a focused taper to swim the sub 23 seconds fast in order to qualify for nationals. I specifically remember thinking, "what have I done to deserve such disappointment, agony, and embarrassment?" Granted, this was nowhere near the end of the world but at the time I felt two feet tall. 

A few friends of mine are coming out to visit me in the Big Sky State for some skiing, snowmobiling, yurt adventures, and other shinanigans Montana has to offer. Pat, Moe and Lily were all scheduled to come out on Saturday to stay for a week before returning to reality in the big cities of New York and Chicago. This evening, after leaving yoga completely satisfied and relaxed mind you, I received a disturbing voicemail from Lily with a distressed voice telling me to call when I had time. Immediately I knew something was terribly wrong and she was canceling. Our short conversation informed me of doctors orders to not travel and she might be back under the knife for a second time this Christmas break. After realizing that we both had nothing further to say, myself being in shock at the news of another procedure and Lily having to deliver both parts, as well as, have to live in the pain/inconvenience of yet another surgery, we said goodbye. 

I can say with the upmost confidence that we have a great time together when life allows us to meet and share an awkward family gathering, a brother and good friend being completely shitfaced, a quarrel between two brothers, a most pleasant Eva interruption, brush with the law(almost the law actually), or however which way the cookie crumbles. I can also say that there is also always a force working against our friendship. Always something. 

What do these occurrences mean in the bigger picture? Larger scheme, if you will. All I can think of here is some menial petty line like - life gives you lemons, make lemonade or my favorite of - if you fall off the horse, get back on. Well I'm glad to say that neither of these two apply here and any other one liner evades my thinking at this moment. (Rejoice you fools.) All I can do now is pray things workout with the next procedure. Pray. Think positive and good will come of all boomerangs thrown into you soccer game. 

3 Doors Down might have said it best in Away From The Sun, "I've got to make this life make sense." Lemons.